How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

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I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

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Once there was a girl named Andrea

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What do you get when a white person and a black person make a baby? A possible high functioning member of society.

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I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

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dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

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a white guy a black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar.

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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MORTAL KOMBAAAAAT BETA 0.3!!! DUDUDUDUDUDUDUNDUN Kano, Kano, Kano, Uh, some asian guy? Kano Kano, Kano, some black guy in the future, Kano, Kano, etc. MORTAL KOMBAAAT BETA 0.3!!!

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Person 1: what is 2 + 2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: no Person 2: what is it than? Person 1: vagina

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What do you get when you put two landsharks together? Three landsharks.

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Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

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What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

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Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

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What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

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Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

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whats worse than jonny james obviously

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

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there once was a frog with no leggs

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

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what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops