Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

thumb_up thumb_down

how do you get a mexican to fall off of a cliff? you push them off

thumb_up thumb_down

So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

thumb_up thumb_down

whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down

1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the clam say to the scuba diver? FUCK MAN! STOP TOUCHING MY JEWELS! WOULD YOU WANT ME TO JUST RIP YOURS AND TAKE THEM WITH ME!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the Hispanic man get elected? Because his policies were unpopular.

thumb_up thumb_down

why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

thumb_up thumb_down

If you give a mouse a cookie... you're destroying their natural diet.

thumb_up thumb_down

That awkward moment when you walk in on your economics teacher shagging Danii ... Anyone ?

thumb_up thumb_down

The lion swallowed his pride.

thumb_up thumb_down

Girls get fucked Boys fuck Gays puke

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock. Who's there? Gestapo. Gestapo who? Your husband is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

thumb_up thumb_down

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down

So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops