Why was the dyslexic cowboy crying when he came into school that day? He had chronic diarrhea.

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You come home and find your family dead. What do you do? Take a picture, post it on facebook

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Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

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What does a baby and a bowling ball share in common? They both displace a similar amount of water.

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So when I came home from work the other day, I saw tha my dog was foaming at the moth, so I took him to the vet It turns out that my dog didn't have a thing for marshmallows but had rabies instead and was promptly put down.

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What's purple and tastes like grapes? Grapes

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A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

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So there is two clowns. Pickle and Jim. If you were asked who was funnier, you would probably say pickle. Well you would be wrong. It's Jim.

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How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

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This is sparta No this is patrick

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

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Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

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On christmas, a bunch of happy kids get machine guns for christmas.Meanwhile in afghanistan, a bunch of dissapointed kids are getting ice skates.

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so a jew walks into a bar and leaves at 9:00 becuase he has work in the morning.

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a creepy movie, and it gave Six nightmares.

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Whats faster than a black man running away from the cops? The speed of light.

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

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Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

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so a piece of grass is walking down the street..... wait a minute thats not right.

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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