So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

How many anti-jokes does it take to change a light bulb? Since anti-jokes are not concrete objects, any change would have to occur metaphorically or abstractly. The number of anti-jokes required would then be irrelevant.

Knock knock. Who's there? The pizza delivery guy. Oh hi.

Why did the man suck at basketball? Because he is white, 5 foot 2, and has no arms. Posted By: Lram

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. *knock knock* -Who's there? -Not Suzy.

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

School

anti jokes are for fags

Why was the man sleeping. He was tired

Knock knock Who's there? Hector Hector who? ....I forgot the rest of the joke but your mom is a whore.

How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

Adam Chebali goes to war and is quickly killed. The rest of the world rejoices as he can no longer post anti-jokes only he thinks are funny and brag about himself on anti-joke.com.

Get in the car.

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

how come the jews were not laughing? because they were in a concentration camp

Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

How do you make a professional gamer cry? You burn his house down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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