Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had died.

A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

Your momma's so fat she has diabetes.

What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

Your mom is so fat...

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

What's Red and Invisible? No Tomatos

So three nazis walk into a B.A.R

I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

Why did the father not text back? He died in a car crash

why did the computer crash? it didn't

3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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