If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

A black guy walks into a bar... he sits down and has a drink

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

A Brunette a ginger and a blonde were getting their hair done? WHich side of the bus did they sit on? Why did i put a question mark on the first part?

How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

what's black and blue and red all over? nothing, you're and idiot.

why was the boy crying. Brcause him and his two sisters got raped by a diseased polar bear. by rangler. thumbs up for more.

What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

What do you call a black man inside a house that is on fire? A fire fighter as well as a hero since he was probably inside the house searching for anyone who was trapped inside

Wanna know something funny? Your face

Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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