A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Woman Rights

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Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

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An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

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My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

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a 5 year old rapes a pedophile

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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Little Jimmy has 100 candy bars, and he eats 95 of them. What dies little Jimmy have? Diabetes

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

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Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops