Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS

As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

so a dyslexic man sold his soul to Santa

Penis.

what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

Q. how did the blond get a college degree in medicine? A. she studied hard and aced her final exam.

What goes up a smokestack instead of down? Murdered Jews, when they get cremated.

What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

what is the entire jewish population minus about 13 million? The Holocaust.

all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

Why did so many white people vote for obama? They strongly believed in what he had to say, and believed he was the right person to lead our country during its troubled times.

A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

You might be a Redneck...if your job requires you to work long hours out in the sun and you do not take advantage of sunscreen.

Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

This is a joke

Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

What did the cheerleader get on Holloween? Raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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