Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A walrus walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

poop is very very yummy.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. What does a rock and a bird have in common? A. Everything. Except a bird can fly and has wings and can breath and eats and makes babies...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When life throws you lemons what should you do? Take cover.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the girl die? No one knows.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How does Stevie Wonder pick up girls? He doesnt, he has someone do it for him

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Lol! Why you wanna know?

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the man who worshiped Satan when he died? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

thumb_up thumb_down

a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down

why the woman scream when she arrived at her surprise party? Everyone was dead!

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops