Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

What did pikachu say when his trainer was murdered? Pikachu.

Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

There were two muffins in an oven one muffin said, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin said, "AHHH A TALKING MUFFIN!"

What does A duck smoke? Quack

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

Your so dumb, you didn't notice I should have used you're. Don't lie

I did your mom..... A favor..... By making you..... A sandwich...... With mustard.....

Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

Your Mama is so fat, when she jumped on the couch, she broke the couch.

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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