What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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Ebola

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Why did the black guy only turn left? Because he was mentally retarded and couldn't tell left from right and had no idea where he was going

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A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

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Where's my shotgun

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What did the cop do when he saw two Mexicans buying coke? Warned them of the health risks of drinking carbonated soft drinks.

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"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

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Why did the monkey fall of the tree? Because Newtons law states that we are all under the influence of gravity and hence an object, in this case the monkey, will fall down if it failed to stay on the tree.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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No it isn't.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

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If you looked up stupid in Webster's dictionary, you wouldn't see a picture of yourself, because Webster's dictionary doesn't have pictures.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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