A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life throws you melons you might be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do u call a guy makin dinner? Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, i was dropped on my head as a baby, 978e456293&*(^$%ZYI467z57967454^&4543^%$54#%^*44jffdGHFYI

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Alex Eggbert

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Video Games

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops