Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

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what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

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womens rights

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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i hate it when Voldemort showers in my nutella

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Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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Who was worse than Hitler? Justin Bieber

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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A guy comes to a doctor and says: - Doctor, lately I'm having this dream where I kill my father and rape my mother. What does it mean? - Nothing.

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What do you call a tree with all of it's branches down? A tree with all of it's branches down.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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What's the difference between a white person and a chair? -The chair isn't a complete douche.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops