A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it was a rather hot day and his attention was momentarily directed towards something else.

Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

A Christian, a Jew and a Muslim fly in an airplane. They all reach safely to their destination and have a lovely vacation.

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

gay rights

GOOD AFTERNOON KIND SIR OR MADAM THIS IS THE KUNDALINI EXPRESS MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER

Why was Timmy sad?

There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They moved the furniture.

Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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