Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

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I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

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My Girlfriend

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Knock knock. Come in. Okay.

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

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Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

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George Bush does not care about black people.

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What is worse

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Friend: I said pass the juice, not gas the jews! Hitler: Oh.

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Whats funnier than killing a black guy. Nothing, it's not funny.

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

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Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

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haiku's are stupid, and do not always make sense, refrigerator.

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A family of black people get onto a plane. The son said to his father: "Why do planes have wings?" The father then replied by saying: "To help them fly son." The plane's wing then fell off due to a building error, then the plane crashed and everyone on board was killed.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

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did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

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Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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