How do you make the perfect anti-joke? Don't tell it.

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What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

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What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb in WW2. None, the Nazis toke away the power and left them to die a Horrible and painful death.

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Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

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If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

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why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 50 in the ashtray.

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Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

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why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

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whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

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Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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cheese

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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