What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

What's brown and sticky A stick

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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