How many babies can you breast feed? 2

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Nobody know he couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Chuck Norris was the leading role in the television show Walker, Texas Ranger.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops