Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

French people.

Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

What did the businessman at work do when he found out his wife was cheating on him? He stayed in his cubicle and continued to work, because he was a diligent, hard-working man.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Boom! Splat! You'll never know.

What has an extra toe and is a bad role model for little girls? Miley Cyrus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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