How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

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Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Womens rights.

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

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It gets very hot in Mianus, Connecticut

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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why did the boy poop his pants Yhe Holocaust

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whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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