how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops