What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

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A black guy pulls into a KFC drive thru and orders some chicken. The cashier tells him that they are out of chicken, so the black goes to McDonald's instead.

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a man walks into a bar and a horsefly eats him

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jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

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*prepares this to get negative votes*

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You should read the Terms of Service.

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Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

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The 70's called. They had the wrong number.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

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Why did the mexican wash his car? The car was dirty

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Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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