A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

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What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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