A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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A duck walks into a bar and is immediately shot to prevent the spread of bird flu.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What has two legs and bleeds alot? Half a cat!

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You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

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PENIS

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A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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Dave: Hi John! John: I have Aids.

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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Q: whats big gray and cant swim A: a castle

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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there are 2 men standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is called Peter

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

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What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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