How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You don't

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In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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What's black and white and red all over? An equality parade with a nearby homicide

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his icecream? A: His arm was chopped off by a ninja

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

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what do you call a kid named kid. kid

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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robin, get in the car.

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. They have been planning a girls night out for weeks.

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

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Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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What do you call 2 black guys hanging out with a white girl? An inter-racial couple helping out their black friend whose wife just died of terminal cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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