Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

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two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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Knock Knock! Come in..

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whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

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What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

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why do prostitutes do what they do? Because they have abusive fathers who always used them as sex slaves as children

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What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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