just in time?

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

Mom: what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Son: I don't know, love you, and talk to you later. Mom: OK, I'll ask your sister.

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

So there's this white guy with a huge dick.

Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

What do Jews and gays have in common? They both would have been killed during the Holocaust.

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

yo mama is so fat that when she stepped on the scale she exclaimed "wow, i'm overweight" she then proceeded to eat a cupcake to mask her pain.

A horse walks into a bar, and is then put down because of the injuries it sustained from the impact.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

Why scooby-doo likes cookies? Because he's chub!

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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