Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

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What's worse than having an ugly face? Having a face like yours.

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What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

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What's big and purple? Barney

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

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What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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Sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops