Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

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-knock knock! -doors open

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

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So I was sitting in traffic the other day... And I got run over.

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You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

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Why was the black man sad? Because his wife and children had been killed in a freak car accident while he had been driving.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

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Why did 9/11 take place? Because God hates Satan

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How did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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(warning- this is sort of funny) A mom takes her son to cvs to pick up her pills. Son- Mom whats a pharmacists? Mom- well sweetie its a person who sells people drugs Monday Morning Teacher- Class, did you learn anything over the weekend? Son- Yah, i learned that my mommy has been taking me with her every week, to a person who sells drugs Later that week Teacher- Yes, hi, um your son has told me that you take him to buy drugs with you, i may have to call social services Mom- what? this is a misunderstanding, i go to a pharmacists to buy drugs. That evening Mom-what did you tell your teacher at school Son- you've been telling me that i go with you to buy drugs Mom- baby i need pills, well, because, im sick. Son- ohhhhhhhhhhhh ok At school Teacher- Billy ive called s.s on your mom, u will be living with foster parents Son- ohhhhhhhhhhhh ok Evening Police- ?Ms. Thackery, is this your student. Teacher- Yes Police- His mom has tradgicly died in a pool of tears after finding out YOU called s.s Mom- what? omg. DAMN Police- Im afraid u r under arrest for the cause of his mothers death Class- yayyyyyyy wooo hooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Billy Billy Billy Billy. hip hip hooray Teacher- Damn Son- mommy? Police- ur mommy's dead, sucks right sooooooo here's a box and ten bucks......... go live your life

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

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Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

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why was the clown sad? because his wife left him

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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