Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

i like my babies how i like my potatoes..... skinned

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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