Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

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Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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