Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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A doctor rides in his Mercedes Benz through a rough, poor part of town. He sees a homeless person who is begging for money. The doctor stops and gets out of his car and asks "Ill give you some money if you need it for food". The homeless person then shoots and kills the doctor, takes his wallet, and buys crack.

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If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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A man walks into a bar, asks for a drink. He then realises that it was a metal bar and not one that serves alcoholic beverages. He then ponders the mysteries of the world and the universe.

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To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

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Knock Knock. I paid good money for a doorbell. Use it, please.

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Knock knock Who's there? April April who? April fools

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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What did the kid with all F's on his report card get? Beat by his parents

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

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So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

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In Soviet Russia You drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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