Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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Yo momma so fat she decided to have lipo suction

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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poopy is poopy

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set? neither did she.

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DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped six's mom.

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? Ouch!

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Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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How do you make a businessman cry? Shoot him in the kneecaps.

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops