What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

SUCK MY NUTS

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you kill a black man? You cn coz he'll beat you up first

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: Why do people post the same anti-joke a bajillion times in a row? A: Because they are stupid ass holes with absolutely no life.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

thumb_up thumb_down +24

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walked into a bar. That must have really hurt him.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the cookie die Because a fat kid was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +22

a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops