What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

why do women rip you off? Because they like money

Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

like if u think princess kenny id the fairest maiden in all the land. if u havent played or watched pewdiepie play south park the stick of truth, disregard this message.

What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

Why did the man die? He had a heart attack.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

I can't submit this joke because I got the captcha wrong

The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

knock knock who's there the german police now pack your stuff and get out

A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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