Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Do you like fishsticks No

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Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

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What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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Poop

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What's young and not funny? Todays anti-joke writers.

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What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

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Jim bean takes out a can of- Let me guess- No.

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Carl has 300 candy bars. He eats 295. What does Carl have? Diabetes. Carl has diabetes.

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops