"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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What time is it when a cow walks into your house? The time that your mother arives.

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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69 is a number not a sex poshion

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

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Thre jews walk into a bar i lied it was a gas chamber

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This is not a joke

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

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What is not a crocodile? The teenage mutant ninja turtles

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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copy me and i will kill you

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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