Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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What's worse then the holocaust? The sun exploding.

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What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

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What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

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what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

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Last night, I went fishing, caught a fish, brought it home, grilled it, ate it, and went to bed.

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Roses are RED , Violets are BLUE , once Valentines day is Over , All ya girls is gonna go back to LOVIN' THE CREW.

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

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wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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What do you call a black man in a Police car? A Police Officer

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An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

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People say the sky's the limit................................ but there's footprints on the moon.

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Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

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What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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