What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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You know what is worse than being dead...being at a Justin Bieber concert

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Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

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Confucius say: Man who fart in church probably has a medical condition and should not be made fun of because that is cruel.

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What's up with women with there jewlery it's there's best friend,but a black man's best friend is reames..

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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Poker? I barely even know her.

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Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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The day the forces of light fight the forces of darkness, we will all live in darkness no matter who wins. Pure darkness will not allow you to see. Pure light will blind you.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

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Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

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Your Momma is so fat that she will most like lose a leg to diabetes which is totally preventable if she eats a well balanced diet. I hope she loses weight. Say hi to her from me please.

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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charlie sheen becomes sober.

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What came first -- the chicken or the egg roll?

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops