Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

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A dying man walked into a shop and started to look at the clothing on display. Then he died.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

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A Mexican got stopped by the police. Turns out it was a mistake and the man lived a happy life in America

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What time is it? I believe it's half past 10, sir. Damn, I'm late for a meeting. May I ask, what time are you supposed to be there? 11 O'clock Why sir you have half an hour left. No shiitt, sherlock

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I hate it when I get an erection and it pushes Pluto out of orbit.

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What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

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You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

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a woman votes!

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What is pink and gets wet a tounge

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Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

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knock knock who's there ?? the police now get out !!

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple that got hit by a bus.

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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There are two muffins in the oven. One says: "It's really getting hot in here!" The other one can't reply because it is already dead.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

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What did the car do? CRASH!

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What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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