What's brown and sticky? A stick

Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

What is worse then finding a worm in your apple!? Getting raped!

Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

Why did the blonde have the biggest tits in 3rd grade? She's 21

Woman's Rights

What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

whats the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? the ferrari is not in my garage.

What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

nba live 13

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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