Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

That's what she didn't say

what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

What is White over Black? Society.

What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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