What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I've had Alzheimer's for as long as I can remember... So since yesterday.... CHAYOTE ASTRONAUT SPACE SAY WHAT?!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What do the Gynecologist and the pizza delivery man have in common? A: They both get to smell the goods but neither one of them can eat it

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What can you sit on, drink from and sleep on? A chair, a cup and a bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Sophie Cameron is Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

"You know what sucks?" "vaccuums?" "you know what meteforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "you what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Sally was ugly like a shaven babboon So she created her own little cacoon And within a week she finally emerged And she smelled like shit what a psycho

thumb_up thumb_down +5

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops