How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

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What is brown and has 15 legs? (They answer "What?") Reply: I don't know I was hoping you would.

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Women's rights.

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"Knock Knock" "whos there" "interupting cow" "interupting cow who" "i have aids"

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Why did the American run over the black man. Because he didn't see him standing there.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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A planes crashes on the US-Canada border. The survivors are promptly taken to a hospital nearby to be treated for their injuries.

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What's the difference between Jew and a bread? Bread does not scream when you put him in oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

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The grass is always greener on the side that uses manure and fertilizer daily.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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haha. i got blocked too!!!!

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Did you hear about the Englishman who ran all the way to Loch Ness? Oh, that's a shame, because I didn't either.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? You've already seen this joke at least SIXTY TIMES on this website, so you already know.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

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A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

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Q: why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A: because it was dead

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My son made a tree fort, it burned down.

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WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT? roger rabbit while hilarious, was an idiot and framed himself....mind F***.

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you and your family will die tonight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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