Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

have you seen the movie, Constipated? Never mind, it hasn't come out yet.

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he needed to get to the store across the street.

That awkward moment when you walk in on your economics teacher shagging Danii ... Anyone ?

I got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen.

- I'm in my mum's car, broom broom. - Get out me car. - Aw.

What's worse than having a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody actually knows this because the chicken could not tell us why he/she crossed the road so it would be nearly impossible to get the answer.

Why was Soren gay? Because he likes to eat men's Penises!

a horse walks into a bar. what does the bartender say? why is there a horse in my bar.

What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

Where did Susie go after the bombing? Everywhere

Q: What do you call a man from south korea? A: I don't know, but I'm not letting him drive my car.

Many people of many races do many things every day.

How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

Lynching Lynching is an extrajudicial execution carried out by a mob, often by hanging, but also by burning at the stake or shooting, in order to punish an alleged transgressor, or to intimidate, control, or otherwise manipulate a population of people. It is related to other means of social control that arise in communities, such as charivari, riding the rail, and tarring and feathering. Lynchings have been more frequent in times of social and economic tension, and have often been the means used by the politically dominant population to oppress social challengers. Violence in the United States against African Americans, especially in the South, rose in the aftermath of the Civil War, after slavery had been abolished and recently freed black men were given the right to vote. Violence rose even more at the end of the century, after southern white Democrats regained their political power in the South in the 1870s. States passed new constitutions or legislation which effectively disfranchised most blacks and many poor whites, established segregation of public facilities by race, and separated blacks from common public life and facilities. Nearly 3,500 African Americans were lynched in the United States between 1882 and 1968, mostly from 1882 to 1920. Lynching during the 19th century in the United States, Britain and colonies, coincided with a period of violence which denied people participation in white-dominated society on the basis of race or gender after the Emancipation Act of 1833. Today lynching is a felony in all states of the United States, defined by some codes of law as "Any act of violence inflicted by a mob upon the body of another person which results in the death of the person," with a 'mob' being defined as "the assemblage of two or more persons, without color or authority of law, for the premeditated purpose and with the premeditated intent of committing an act of violence upon the person of another." Lynching in the second degree is defined as "Any act of violence inflicted by a mob upon the body of another person and from which death does not result." To sustain a conviction for lynching, at least some evidence of premeditation must be produced, but "The common intent to do violence" may be formed before or during the assemblage."

Your momma is so white, when she goes out in the sun it is necessary for her to use a lotion with an SPF greater than 30 because she burns easily and is also afraid of skin cancer.

Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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