DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Why were Jews discriminated against for thousands of years? They weren't supposed to. Jews are people just like you and me. And for every ignorant person out there that hates Jews, you better watch your back because God is watching you.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not good at poems Nice tits

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hello. We would like to talk about Jesus with you.

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Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

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what's better to a kid than ice cream from an ice cream truck? when you realize the driver was at your house 3 days ago notifying you that he is a convicted pedophile.

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Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rather sleep in the class Like a boss in the school -HairyBoss

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knock, knock. come in.

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what do you call an indian dating service? you dont call it anything there all arranged marriages.

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What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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Dude: Hey want to hear a joke? Other dude: What is it? Dude: Joke. Other dude: What? Dude: I don't know. That was a joke ladies an gentleman.

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Why couldn't sally go on the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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