roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

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You know whats retarted? people with down syndrome.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

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Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

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Why did the baby die? Abortion

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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the man the invented it doesnt want it, the man that wants it doesnt need it, and the man the needs it doesnt know it....what is it? a coffin.

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Why did the boy miss the school bus? He died in his sleep

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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Q: What is the difference between everything and nothing? A: everything! Moral: NOTHING!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops