Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

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Whats worse than a Worm in Your Apple? Being raped

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What did nike say to addidas? Hi

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The penn state football administration

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Woman's rights

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There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

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What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

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Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

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Six million.

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Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

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how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

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whats stupid and gay all of my friends

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What do you call someone allergic to water ? Waterproof

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

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Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

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Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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