a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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What is worse than a paper cut? two paper cuts What is worse than two paper cuts The Holocaust What is worse than The Holocaust Three paper cuts

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whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

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How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

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The WNBA

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Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

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My sister has to take a dump

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Women

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What's 1+1? 4.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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69

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Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

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hi

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Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

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Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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