If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

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Yo mamma so black, she uses armor all instead of lotion...

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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What do you call the Flintstones if they were black? N****rs

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Matthew Baker

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What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

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Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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yada yada

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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A man says to his doctor, "doctor, doctor, I think I have a split personality." The doctor responds, "That makes 4 of us."

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Liverpool City Football Club

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why did the bus roll down the hill? Children were playing in the street.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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